Showing posts with label breaching. Show all posts
Showing posts with label breaching. Show all posts

Friday, March 2, 2012

Houston, We Have A (Huge) Problem

NASA never ceases to amaze me.

Within the span of the last few years, they've managed some of the most incredible feats, made especially incredible considering they're a taxpayer-funded government agency. One of their latest feats includes losing a laptop.

I know, you're probably thinking that stuff probably happens to about one out of every ten laptop owners. Probably happens to businesses and organizations all the time.

But this situation is a little bit different.

See, this particular laptop includes a few little codes NASA may find useful someday. Codes to the International Space Station (see previous post regarding Space Stations and Swimming Pools). No biggie.

But seriously! This wouldn't be so bad, except they'd already begun the pattern in 2009, losing equipment and devices and gadgets (none of which are exactly cheap, to put it mildly), wrapping up their streak with Loss #48, the laptop containing the ISS codes. You would think someone would say, "Gee, we've been losing a ton of crap. Maybe we should start cracking down."

If they were a business, somebody would have lost a job a long time ago. Someone would have established a Loss Prevention department. Somebody would have done something so another multi-million-dollar item wouldn't suddenly drop out of inventory.

But NASA apparently just shrugs, and Congress keeps handing out the dough. After all, the taxpayers can handle it.

Oh, and this doesn't include the fact that their $58 million-per-year IT security has been breached approximately 54,000 times since 2010. Hey, guys! Yeah, you! The ones who send probes to the outer reaches of the solar system and calculate distances between stars! Ever hear of FIREWALLS AND ANTIVIRUS PROGRAMS? One trip to Best Buy could save you a lot of headaches. Where the heck is that $54 million a year going?

No wonder we haven't put anyone on the moon since 1972. We've had Laurel and Hardy running the show.

I hope after all this investment with my own hard-earned dollars I'll at least get the secret to the Rubik's Cube out of the deal. It seems they've got enough guys at NASA working on that.

Monday, July 26, 2010

So What's With The Whale?

Hey, welcome to the Blurt Blog!

This is where I share a bunch of thoughts -- random stuff. You know, politics, music, YouTube, books, movies, you name it.

Except for Telletubbies. Telletubbies = off limits!

So my first thought?

Whales.

Yeah, whales.

You heard about that whale that jumped out of the water and landed on a sailboat, right?

Apparently some people have accused the couple on the boat of harassing the whale, and thus ticking it off.

Others insist the incident never happened, and the photo we saw all over the news was just some really good Photoshop finesse.

Well, if you watch the VIDEO (yes, there is a real video -- take that, Photoshop conspiracy theorists!), you’ll see the whale is a good hundred feet from the boat at the start.

How are you going to stand in a sailboat and harass a whale from a hundred feet away?

Seriously.

"HEY, YOU STUPID WHALE! YOUR MOM WEARS ARMY FLIPPERS!"

Maybe throw some rocks at it?

Wait, I know . . . They were using WHALE RACIAL SLURS!

What’s a derogatory term for a RIGHT WHALE? Rush Limbaugh?

Seriously, though, check out the photo at the top of the post. It's the picture of the whale “attacking” the boat.

Remove the boat, and what do you see?

A right whale. Breaching.

Like whales do -- ALL THE TIME.

Check it out:

http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://img.mailchimp.com/2008/10/30/044bce6a71/right_whale_pix.jpg&imgrefurl=http://us1.campaign-archive.com/%3Fu%3D946679e7fe51bbf81ce578cc1%26id%3Da6a12e2cab%26e%3D%255BUNIQID%255D&h=674&w=601&sz=64&tbnid=FUgkHWrTP59lGM:&tbnh=138&tbnw=123&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dright%2Bwhale%2Bbreaching%2Bphoto&hl=en&usg=__WSWStWgPWekU8aAfIkKzsMcFeZQ=&sa=X&ei=tKpNTPaTLNy1nAffnITYCw&ved=0CCcQ9QEwAw

But no -- the boaters couldn't possibly have been in the wrong place at the wrong time.

THEY WERE HARASSING THE WHALE!

Hello! Humans are inherently EVIL and STUPID and WANT to tick off something that weighs 40 TONS.

Give me a break.

Keep your shirt on, PETA.

Literally.

There are other dragons to slay.

Waitaminnit -- we gotta be nice to dragons, too?

Until next time, don’t annoy Rosie O’Donnell!

She could sink your boat.